“Sitting in traffic, my phone began to ring. My husband said very frankly, ‘Yes…Of course…When do you need us to come?’ He whispered, ‘Another sibling was born yesterday. They want him to join our family.’ He didn’t even have a name. I immediately began to cry and shook my head yes.”
“We were long-distance, unmarried, and unprepared. A gaping sinkhole opened up and swallowed the ‘normal’ out of this socially well-adjusted, academically inclined, and on-task college kid. There I was, confused and afraid…with life inside of me.”
“Those tub toys? Just throw them out.”
“I wasn’t sure how to answer. ‘When I was your age, my dad was in jail. I want to show you how to do the things my father never taught me.’ He thought about what I’d said, and then he asked a question I didn’t expect: ‘Will you show me how to use the caulk gun?'”
“I get strange looks at the grocery store. I don’t fit the stereotype of the absent or minimally involved black father. I am not a weekend dad. I’m here for my kids, always. When questioned about the whereabouts of my children’s mother, I politely say, ‘I am both their mother and their father.’ It’s a big job—but my heart is equipped for this.”
“There is nothing sexy about taking SIX kids on a plane or driving a church van, but these are the things that bring us the greatest joy.”
“’She can’t possibly be ready to date, can she?’ Now 3 years in, I’m asked all the time, ‘Why are you still single?’ It hurts so bad you feel it down to your bones.”
“Weeks from our wedding I was told, ‘You have cancer.’ He arrived at the hospital reeking of perfume. ‘I found someone. I’m in love. She’s pregnant.’ He left our fairytale for the woman I sat next to at his company dinner. She’d just rubbed my pregnant belly.”
“My water broke at 22 weeks. I spent weeks on bedrest at home with 4 kids under 4. We spent 8 weeks separated, me in a hospital bed, begging God to bring my boy into the world healthy.”
“That one shocked me. It snuck in my comments, buried amongst thousands. This person had pity for my son. Pity for our situation. They saw him and saw sadness.”
