Health

‘In 2 weeks, you will meet the love of your life. And when you do, you will know it.’ But then came a warning. ‘You must do the right thing, or you will be cursed.’ He winked, and walked away.’

“That’s when our eyes met. It was like time stopped. It was like the music on the dance floor silenced, and all I could hear was my own heartbeat. I still remember what the room smelled like. I couldn’t look away. I was frozen. This was him. I knew it, and felt it, from my head to my feet.”

‘She laid there. I stroked her head, closed her eyes, kissed her. I removed her collar, and told her one last time, ‘I love you so much.’ I filled my pockets with tissues, and walked out.’

“A lady behind me in line was excited to see her. After a few head pets, the lady told her to ‘have a good day.’ I almost lost it. I almost fell to the floor. The cashier went to hand me my receipt and I missed. The tears filled my eyes. I couldn’t grab a receipt. I couldn’t speak.”

‘Mama, can you come in the water with me, please?’ She was ignored. ‘Mama, come play with me?’ She asked 4 more times. Mama glanced over at her, but never got off the phone.’

“While at the pool, I watched a young Mama and her little daughter enter, dressed in very nice coordinating swimming suits. The mom talked loudly on her phone while her daughter stood waiting. I imagined the photos she took being perfectly posted with a caption like, ‘Pool time with my girly!'”

‘I choked out, ‘So, their dad and I are no longer living together.’ 8 months into fostering two of the girls, and 2 months after saying ‘yes!’ to adopting, my children’s father and I separated.’

“We had 5 kids and had just celebrated 6 years of marriage. Our entire life crashed, the walls built with facades and fantasies. I was secretly dying inside. It was silent, painful. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d be taking family photos without a husband, my children’s father.”

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