‘I woke up feeling off. When I wiped, there was blood. He arrived so tiny, so transparent. We were terrified. I couldn’t cope with being away from him.”

‘I woke up feeling off. When I wiped, there was blood. He arrived so tiny, so transparent. We were terrified. I couldn’t cope with being away from him.”
“I was topping the scales at over 650 pounds. I pulled up and asked him if he was okay. A rush of cars started coming and they weren’t slowing down. Then I heard brakes screeching, the glass breaking. I flew through the air. I’d have to have my entire tongue removed.”
“I remember yelling at God in my minivan after another depressing doctor’s appointment. This wasn’t our plan. ‘Are you going to take me?’ His room was concrete blocks, no outlets, and a window so high you couldn’t see out.”
“My first phone call ended in, ‘What just happened? ‘It’s hard to swallow I’m not his first wife, and I will not have his first child. I was blind to it, because I didn’t want to read the sad stories.”
“I have a limited amount of energy, and the world doesn’t care. It’s time to stop endlessly worrying about details we have no control over instead, let’s teach our kids.”
“And then she says it. IT. ‘I’m worried.’ I know what this means. This means things are not good. THIS IS NEVER GOOD. I refuse to let any person touch my sleeping baby.”
“He was always sick. When the doctor was listening to his lungs, he noticed his tongue was twitching. They stuck a probe into his muscles. ’Don’t google the disease.’ Of course, I immediately googled it. I shouldn’t have.”
“I was a complete and total workaholic-girl-boss with my own business. I started noticing headaches often and having spit-up episodes. Part of me thought it was anxiety. These episodes, I found out, were seizures.”
“He was born full-term, weighing just two pounds. He gained five pounds. Then the seizures started. All we saw were tubes, PICC lines, and NG tubes. We weren’t getting any answers.”
“A year after his transplant, Xander started throwing up. I rushed him to the E.R. because I thought he was facing organ rejection. The words were crippling. I wanted to grab the cancer with my bare hands and fight it to death.”