“I thought she’d sleep it off but the next morning, her breathing was off. It hurt her so much to cough that she’d scream out in pain each time. I was offering all her favorites, but she was declining food. She was placed on IV fluids and oxygen immediately. I wish I would have listened to my gut.”
“We started noticing I was in a lot of pain during intercourse. One night, I was in so much pain I couldn’t bear it. I was taken to the ER. They told me I had an ovarian cyst rupture. I had no idea what that meant. They gave me some pain pills and told me to ‘rest.’ I went on like nothing was wrong. My periods were not coming on time. I’d miss an entire month or two. I was dealing with all these emotions while trying to maintain hope. Time was flying by, and I still didn’t have a baby.”
“My first symptom hit like a ton of bricks. I felt heaviness in my chest I couldn’t explain. We had to run to catch our connecting flight. This is the exact moment I knew. I could not run. I WANTED to, but my body wouldn’t let me. I ate well and exercised often, so I knew something was very, very wrong. My friends said it sounded like I was having an anxiety attack. ‘I’m only 32 years old. How can this happen?’ Our lives changed forever.”
“‘She’s going to live, right?’ The doctor looked at me and said words I will never forget… ‘These babies don’t live.’ She handed me a box of rough, thin tissues and left the room. I completely lost all composure and thrashed around that room like I myself was being killed. ‘Not my girl… not my girl…’ I asked Matt, ‘What are we going to do?’ Without a pause, my brave husband said, ‘We’re going to give her a name.’”
“I told both of my children about the time I agreed to kiss a boy in the back of the school yard when I was way too young. How I really, really liked this boy. I told them how mortified I was when friends gathered around us and agreed to cover their eyes, but didn’t. Instead, they watched it all and laughed. Love can make you do stupid things.”
“The doctor sat down and said, ‘I’m so sorry.’ Nurses flooded into the room. I was only 19. ‘I can’t lose my babies.'”
“He said, ‘I can’t do this.’ I drove around aimlessly, hoping I would find him. His mental illness took ahold of him and blurred his vision. I got a late-night call. For the next 7 months, I sobbed to and from every doctor’s appointment, wishing my daughter’s father were by my side.”
“I was given a second chance to live.”
“I might be the only female millennial in her 30s not presently seeking a tribe. I’m a stay-at-home mother of 3 who isn’t in search of living her best life with her best pals ready to drape her in overgenerous compliments and praise. And I sure as hell don’t want to be a leader to anyone except for my kids.”
“So tonight, while you were sleeping, I went to your room and counted your freckles. I gently tangled my fingers in your curls. I listened to you breathe. I sat beside your bed and tried to meet you in your dreams. We laughed and sang in silly voices until it was time for me to go to my own room. I whispered, ‘I love you,’ in your ear. I knew from the beginning you were going to grow. I had no idea how it would simultaneously rip me to pieces.”
