‘I was sitting in this green recliner, holding my baby. He was wrapped up and delivered, carrying with him the secret of an extra chromosome.’: Mom shares journey on World Down Syndrome Day

“Today is World Down Syndrome Day. This specific day always has me feeling a little sad, somewhat reflective, and looking forward with hope.

I remember when this picture what taken. I remember sitting in that green recliner/rocking chair at Lebonheur Children’s Hospital. I always wondered why it was green. Such a terrible color.

It was the chair I was sitting in when I received David’s Down syndrome diagnosis. I remember the sting of the instant tears. I remember the ringing in my ears. I remember feeling sick to my stomach.

I remember looking at Louis and feeling guilty because I felt as if I had delivered a son who wouldn’t be enough for him. I remember Louis holding my hand and telling me he loved me and loved David, he wasn’t disappointed.

I can’t think about that specific moment without shedding a few tears. It was one of those moments I can point to and know my life was altered forever.

I was sitting in the green recliner holding my baby boy who I had dreamt of for years. He was wrapped up and delivered! Delivered and carrying with him the secret of an extra chromosome, almond eyes, medical issues…

This morning, I’m almost 9 years into this journey. I’m sitting in a chair in my living room drinking coffee, trying to find the right words, and I barely recognize the girl sitting in the green recliner.

Because of David, and because of grief, I have suffered. Since David, I am stronger than I ever knew. It’s not me, though; it’s God in me.

He is faithful. He is good. He does not lie.

True to the girl in the green recliner and true to me today.

Yes, a Down syndrome diagnosis is hard. It will always be hard. This past week was one of my hardest yet, but what things in this life that are of true worth and value aren’t difficult?

David brings so much joy, happiness, innocence, laughter to our home. He is perfect just the way he is because our God does what is best and doesn’t make mistakes.”

This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Abigail Sacran of New Albany, Mississippi. You can follow her journey on her Instagram and Spreading Sunshine Instagram Submit your own story here, and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.

Read more powerful perspective from special needs mom: 

‘This is all my fault. I did this to her.’ For months, I felt worthless.’: Mom embraces daughter’s Down Syndrome diagnosis, urges ‘see the positives’

‘I said to my husband, ‘I think something is wrong with the baby.’ There was fluid in the back of his neck. ‘We need to admit you. Today.’: Mom says ‘Down syndrome is the best thing to ever happen to our family’

‘As I sat alone in the NICU, postpartum body aching, one thought rose to the top of my mind: ‘You are exactly who our family needs.’: Mom navigates son’s Down syndrome diagnosis, multiple heart defects

‘I’m sorry, your son has Down syndrome. You have 2 weeks to make a decision…’ Oh, my Grady, NO prenatal test could predict your heart of GOLD.’: Mom celebrates the beauty of Down Syndrome in stunning photo shoot