“My husband doesn’t have a lot, neither of us do. We scrape and scrape to pay bills and put food in our bellies, but after almost two years of dating we decided that we couldn’t wait anymore, so we didn’t.
I wasn’t even thinking about rings, I just wanted to marry my best friend, but he wouldn’t have it.
He scraped up just enough money to buy me two matching rings from Pandora. Sterling silver and cubic zirconia (CZ) to be exact.
That’s what sits on my ring finger, and I am so in love with them.
While we were purchasing my rings however, another lady that was working there came over to help the lady selling them to us.
She said, ‘Y’all can you believe that some men get these as engagement rings? How pathetic.’
When she said that I watched my now husband’s face fall.
He already felt bad because he couldn’t afford the pear-shaped set that so obviously had my heart and covered my Pinterest page.
He already felt like a failure, asking me again and again, ‘Are you sure you’ll be happy with these? Are you sure this is okay?’
He was so upset at the idea of not making me happy enough and of me not wanting to marry him because my rings didn’t cost enough money or weren’t flashy enough.
Old Ariel would have ripped that woman a new one. Mature Ariel said, ‘It isn’t the ring that matters, it is the love that goes into buying one that is.’
We bought the rings and left.
Y’all, I would have gotten married to this man if it had been a 25 cent gum ball machine ring.
When did our nation fall so far to think the only way a man can truly love a woman is if he buys her $3,000+ jewelry and makes a public decree of his affection with said flashy ring?
Sure they are nice, sure the sentiment is wonderful and I’m not trying to cut down any of your experiences, but when did it come to all that? Why do material possessions equate love??
My husband was so afraid of me not wanting him because he couldn’t afford a piece of jewelry. He was afraid that the love I have for him would pale because he couldn’t afford the wedding set I wanted.
The world has made it this way and it is so sad.
Ultimately we couldn’t wait any longer… so we eloped.
I’ve never been this happy in my life and I couldn’t imagine spending it with anyone else ever. Here I am, courthouse married, $130 ring set, the love of my life by my side and happier than I could ever imagine.”
This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Ariel Desiree McRae. Be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories.
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