“A miracle came just days before he passed away. At just 20 months old, our son had only verbalized one word. Dog. Yet, he responded to my wife and I as we laid over his crib, tears falling from our cheeks, expressing our love for him. With absolute perfect clarity, our little boy looked up at us. I held him for the last time. I crave his smile. I miss seeing his eyes light up.”
“Ty threw his hands over his ears and started to rock back and forth, moaning. I shot up quickly. This was the start of a meltdown. I tried to get my son to his feet, but it was too late. Ty slid off the bench and onto the ground. I fell beside him, my heart aching. My son never cries, yet here he was, sobbing in front of his dream: the train.”
“I collapsed. I wept before our 3 children. Rebuilding myself like a child, I called my mother in the evening. I told her I was confused and utterly broken. Aged 24, I needed her comfort again. ‘Your father and I love you no matter what happens,’ she said, and my fitful breath slowed. Being a human male, I’m very good at pretending I have things under control. It took a desperate sense of weakness, therefore, to call her.”
“I needed to go in for surgery. This terrified me. I thought I could handle the pain – I was wrong. I was in the bathtub. Tears flood my eyes. My daughter sat next to the tub, sharing blue raspberry Jell-O. ‘Do you need to take a bath? I can eat Jell-O with you.’ She is the most caring, sweet, and loving 3-year-old. Finally, it was announced we had a girl, her cord was cut, and she was laid on my chest. I was still sure something bad was going to happen.”
“She was all nervous and excited, waiting for him to text her. I found myself feeling jealous. I came home to my kids not listening, my kitchen a mess, and my husband complaining, ‘I thought you’d be back 20 minutes ago?’ I rolled my eyes at him and sat on the bed with laundry piles all around me. I sat there thinking, ‘I miss those first dates.'”
“Your kids will need a different coordinating outfit for each holiday, a gift for every teacher, a cookie swap, ornament-decorating party, your mother-in-law’s eggnog recipe and a tasteful dress for yourself. Not to mention the avalanche of toys that’s about to descend on your house, try and look grateful. Seriously though.”
“Audrey grabbed the hem of the dress and was shaking her head, ‘I no want it.’ Shocked, I questioned, ‘What do you mean you don’t want it? Of course you want this! It’s adorable!’ It was a corduroy dress with a collar and hot pink trim, what’s not to love? I am Southern, after all. ‘I no want it.’ I took a deep breath, and a step back.”
“When this kid constantly threatened to beat Drew up, the school did nothing. When this kid followed Drew down the hall making fun of him on video, the school did nothing. When other kids told teachers and administrators he was harassing Drew, the school did nothing. Drew decided he would quit relying on the adults to protect him. He decided HE would do something.”
“Those two names caught me off guard. Her brother and sister passed away within 2 months of birth. Tears instantly formed in my eyes. There is no handbook for how to survive the death of a child.”
“‘You’re boring. Stop trying to change me.’ I broke up with him. Then I found out I was pregnant. Baby was born by emergency c-section. I thought I was going to die. As soon as I got home, I couldn’t wait to get drunk again. My son was 10 weeks old, it was my birthday, I celebrated HARD. I couldn’t move the next day, couldn’t even change his diaper, so sick. Maternity leave became wine o’clock. I’d count down the hours to 5 p.m. I was now a grown-up drinker, a mom. Wine to relax with my baby, that’s normal, right?”
