“You need to listen to the doctors. You need to breathe. Right now, you can’t see past those hospital walls. One day you will. One day you’ll see the beauty in all they did for your baby girl. One day you’ll be forgive the neurosurgeon who you found so blunt and cold. One day you will be thankful Eva was in your arms, and not on an operating table, when that last breath came.”
“I did it. I obliged. I smiled and pretended to have fun. I slept in that teeny tiny space. But I paid for it the next morning. Boy, did I ever. Y’all. I can’t do that anymore. I’m too old, or too grouchy, or too in-love with sleep. Whichever it may be, I just can’t do that anymore. I’d give just about anything for my 16-year-old body again.”
“He looked at me like ‘but I don’t get it, momma, I’m okay. I’ll just get up.’ He collapsed again. I ran over to him, trying to give him water. Confused. Panicked. I didn’t know what was going on. Was he over heated? Dehydrated? I’m a nurse. Why didn’t I know?! Figure it out. Figure it out I kept telling myself. It took only ONE hour from the time we left the water for Oliver to breathe his last breath.”
“I want to watch you grow up. I want to see what you wear on your first day of school, who you fall in love with. I don’t want to miss a moment. If I wake up, I will fight for you every day. If I don’t, please don’t ever doubt the power of my undying, unrelenting, never-ending love for you.”
“I didn’t learn anything was wrong with my son until 2 weeks before I had him. It went from ‘something might be wrong with his foot’ to ‘he is completely incompatible with life’. We waited for the genetic results to come back knowing every hour could be his last. All I could think was, ‘This can’t be his story.’ He’s a warrior.”
“I ordered a mini fridge and had forgotten about it. So, when I got a delivery notification I was like, ‘Oh, okay.’ I walked out to my rug being three feet of the ground and was like, ‘What is happening!?’ I couldn’t stop laughing.”
“Earlier that day, my mom had stolen my father’s gun and packed our bags. She knew she had to get us out before he killed us all. Soon, the police called. ‘Return the gun.’ She begged the police not to return it to him after he threatened her life, but they did it anyway. I was dropped off at my friend’s house. She was supposed to pick me up at 5 p.m. Never would I have imagined that I’d never see my mom or dad ever again.”
“I signed up for a support system overseas. You send care packages and exchange emails. I happened to get my now husband. The first thing he said was ‘Hey, baby,’ and it melted my heart. Just four months after we first embraced, we decided to get married.”
“I remember feeling pain, but I was pregnant with twins so I didn’t think too much about it. I could hear nurses laughing in the next room at the sound of another baby’s heartbeat. I sat there, waiting. Then, the nurse came. ‘Your son’s heart stopped.’ I sat in silence. I just wanted to go to sleep, wake up in the morning, and have everything be okay.”
“I had an argument with my teenage daughter. Through her tears, she said the one thing I have been dreading. I knew it was coming, but when she said it, it still took me to my knees. I was speechless. But you know what? She’s right. She is absolutely right. It’s not the same after her father’s death.”
