“The tears have poured down my face, my heart racing as I finally share our news. Being pregnant after child loss is one of the most difficult things I have gone through in my life. To be honest, I was too scared.”
‘It’s a secret I’ve been holding closely to my heart. Six years after being pregnant with our triplets, and then losing two of them, I am pregnant.’
‘He is our wild child. Our rowdy, free spirited, change the world child who I contemplated co-sleeping with well into Jr. High. What would you think of him?’
“First I want to tell you, I didn’t always love you the way I do now.”
‘Good job Mommy. You came just in time.’ I asked her why. She replied, ‘I didn’t want Addison to feel bad that I have two daddies, and she only has one.’
“‘Why would she feel bad?,’ I asked. It was in that moment, I knew I would never have to worry about Emma missing a piece of her heart. It never left her. Unlike her younger siblings, she has two daddies that love her. Her daddy here at home, and her daddy in heaven.”
‘I threw my baby in a dumpster. No goodbyes, no tears.’
“My hands shook as I grabbed a Dixie cup and gently scooped this little piece of flesh, my heart, my blood, from its watery grave. A moment later, I left the bathroom. My little burden wrapped in paper towels, and put it in my purse.”
‘I kept my pregnancy a secret. I knew coming home from the war would be tough, but I expected him to be a better father. He started drinking and blaming me.’
“I was working full time, coming home to a 2-year-old, while his dad played video games. My initial thought was ‘How??’ I saved the test to show their father. But that never happened. So I sent him a message. Straight to the point. ‘I’m pregnant.’ He packed all of his stuff, and was just gone.”
‘That girl wears so much makeup, she must be high maintenance. She’s pretty, so she’s dumb. I see an awful lot of claws out.’
“Growing up, I was often complimented that I was ‘not like other girls’. I loved to play sports, crack jokes and hang out with my brother’s friends. I put my hair in a pony tail and wore blue jeans. And I wasn’t like other girls. Because other girls were… Hmm. I don’t know, exactly.”
‘Our beautifully ‘normal’-looking child just cussed us out and threw a chair. That isn’t your fault any more than it’s mine, or his really. He isn’t a problem, but he is HAVING a problem.’
“When Karen says, ‘Ugh, my kids are so hard! They just called me ‘mean’ in Target. I was so embarrassed!’ I want to shake you and tell you how easy you have it and to hug your kids because they are freaking angels!”
‘Acid from the airbag burned my eyes. My first thought was, ‘Call Mom.’ I climbed out of my window, dripping in blood. ‘Mom, I crashed the car. I see cops coming. I love you.’: Man overcomes addiction, ‘I own my truth today’
“I walked to my church, 5 miles away in the freezing rain, knowing I may have just seen my father and mother for the last time. I sat in the fourth row. I stared down at the ground, tears still running down my face. I wanted to be able to apologize for what I was about to do.”
‘I was looking at my phone when my wife asked me a question. She was obviously irritated. She’d asked me the same question twice already. I’d responded ‘sure’ to a non-yes or no question.’
“I was only half listening, screwing around online. It’d been a long day at work. I wanted a mental break. My wife’s lips were drawn to a tight line, her right hand on her hip. So I put my phone down and tried a different approach.”
‘I felt like a building was collapsing on my chest. I had sharp pains. When I got up to get my screaming baby, I fainted. I couldn’t move, so I just sat until my husband came home.’
“I went to the hospital by ambulance and apologized to the paramedics. She asked me ‘why?’ I told her, ‘Because if I wasn’t having a heart attack, I’d feel bad I was wasting people’s time.’ We both laughed at how ridiculous it sounded. But I continued to apologize to everyone.”