“I did it. I obliged. I smiled and pretended to have fun. I slept in that teeny tiny space. But I paid for it the next morning. Boy, did I ever. Y’all. I can’t do that anymore. I’m too old, or too grouchy, or too in-love with sleep. Whichever it may be, I just can’t do that anymore. I’d give just about anything for my 16-year-old body again.”
“He looked at me like ‘but I don’t get it, momma, I’m okay. I’ll just get up.’ He collapsed again. I ran over to him, trying to give him water. Confused. Panicked. I didn’t know what was going on. Was he over heated? Dehydrated? I’m a nurse. Why didn’t I know?! Figure it out. Figure it out I kept telling myself. It took only ONE hour from the time we left the water for Oliver to breathe his last breath.”
“I want to watch you grow up. I want to see what you wear on your first day of school, who you fall in love with. I don’t want to miss a moment. If I wake up, I will fight for you every day. If I don’t, please don’t ever doubt the power of my undying, unrelenting, never-ending love for you.”
“I didn’t learn anything was wrong with my son until 2 weeks before I had him. It went from ‘something might be wrong with his foot’ to ‘he is completely incompatible with life’. We waited for the genetic results to come back knowing every hour could be his last. All I could think was, ‘This can’t be his story.’ He’s a warrior.”
“I ordered a mini fridge and had forgotten about it. So, when I got a delivery notification I was like, ‘Oh, okay.’ I walked out to my rug being three feet of the ground and was like, ‘What is happening!?’ I couldn’t stop laughing.”
“When the medics came in, they didn’t have that ‘okay, we have this under control’ look on their face. When I reached the hospital, I had no idea how to fill out the paperwork. I couldn’t tell you any of the answers. ‘Tell me what’s going on,’ I said to the doctor. He did just that, and it wasn’t looking good. I became a widow at 26.”
“Earlier that day, my mom had stolen my father’s gun and packed our bags. She knew she had to get us out before he killed us all. Soon, the police called. ‘Return the gun.’ She begged the police not to return it to him after he threatened her life, but they did it anyway. I was dropped off at my friend’s house. She was supposed to pick me up at 5 p.m. Never would I have imagined that I’d never see my mom or dad ever again.”
“Then, she slid in my inbox! ‘I dare you to come outside and kiss me.’ We met at the stairs, looked at each other, her hand softly grabbed my face. Her lips felt like my missing puzzle piece. Everyone told us it wouldn’t work, that same-sex couples were an abomination. I’m so glad I didn’t listen. When you know, you know.”
“I remember feeling pain, but I was pregnant with twins so I didn’t think too much about it. I could hear nurses laughing in the next room at the sound of another baby’s heartbeat. I sat there, waiting. Then, the nurse came. ‘Your son’s heart stopped.’ I sat in silence. I just wanted to go to sleep, wake up in the morning, and have everything be okay.”
“People look at me and wonder why I’m confident or why I am not ashamed.”
