“I felt like I was important and loved. A few months later, my mom took me to the doctor. I was pregnant, at 15 years old. He hit me in the back of my head multiple times but he took me to Taco Bell after, so he still loved me. Where else would I go anyway?”
“I looked up from my bed and saw my mother and sister at the door. The look in their eyes is something I never want to see again. I feared that I had to be cured. I wish I had seen the warning signs.’
“I knew the dangers of short-term volunteers going into orphanages and getting attached. ‘She won’t let anyone play with her. She’s very stubborn.’ But I was stubborn too. Our doctor took off his glasses and looked me in the eyes. ‘Have you considered pursuing custody?’ I felt the weight of his words. I was young. Really young.”
“I will recognize my son’s loyalty is first to you. I will refrain from gossiping about you to family members. I will not harbor a grudge if you tell me, ‘I’m sorry, but we just can’t make that work right now.'”
“I crack open a tired eyelid to see it’s not even 6 a.m. The rain beating down on our roof is drowned out by the billowing coming from our kids’ room. I lose my cool. It’s been under an hour of complete chaos. This is when my husband and I shift from relying on each other, to turning on each other.”
“He was so insistent on going. I thought I was just being paranoid. ‘What did I do wrong? What did I do?’ I didn’t eat. I didn’t sleep. At this point, I was heavily pregnant. Then, I got news from his family there were absolutely no relatives in the area I dropped him off. It was another woman’s house. I didn’t trust my gut. Just like that, he stopped calling and texting. He fell off the face of the planet.”
“I was nervous and excited the morning of the surgery. This was finally happening! We could feel my dad’s presence in the room. We each donated to a stranger, for him.”
“My father was not a part of my life early on. He was successful businessman and wasn’t ready for a kid. But my mom was struggling, and he could give me what my mom couldn’t. Until he changed too.”
“‘Mrs. Filcik, we got the results.’ I was on the floor in the middle of the hallway with tears running down my cheeks. The doctor asked, ‘Mrs. Filcik, are you OK?’ I managed to say, ‘Yes, I will be. Thank you for calling,’ before hanging up.”
“I’m here to call us out on all of our mild-mannered modesty. I’ve realized we ARE special, and we deserve that title. No, not everyone can do it. You are different. Your child is different. I am tired of wearing the martyr mask with an ‘aw shucks’ and a ‘not little ol me.’”
