“It’s not a ‘I’ll be nice when he’s nice’ thing.”
“It’s not a ‘I’ll be nice when he’s nice’ thing.”
“A parent asked me the other day, ‘Are you sending home a packet of work for the summer?’ Take it or leave it…here’s my Summer Packet.”
“For those who were wishing to say goodbye, I’m so sorry. This all happened so much faster than we expected.”
“It will be weird. It will be scary. Your boobs will be sore. Your hands and feet will swell to the size of a pufferfish.”
“How many times in a day do you tell your child to ‘hurry up?’ Did you ever just STOP and try to get inside their head?”
“To all the future moms out there – I see you, and others see you. We know your pain, and we feel your hope. Don’t give up.”
“As we were preparing to leave he told us to hold on a minute. Silence. Excuse me? Did I just hear you correctly? Say that again please…”
“I promised myself that if I made it home alive, I’d never sleep on the ground again.”
“It was like as soon as she realized the tooth fairy wasn’t real, she got a dose of the hormone fairy which WAS real, and let me tell you – the hormone fairy is a jerk, too.”
“Dad looks up and says, ‘I lost my patience with your mom.’ I tell him he is carrying a load none of us can imagine and frustration is going to happen sometimes.”