“’HEELLLLPPPP!!!! I STUCK!!!!!’
Stepping out of the shower, I heard a hysterical call for help from one of my toddlers.
I quickly evaluated her cry to determine if I had time for clothes, but she sounded too frantic.
So, I decided to be a 10/10 mom and rush my bare a** out just in case she’s clinging to the top of a bookshelf for dear life, or something equally ridiculous but possible.
I race out while my body is covered with droplets of water, which soon turns to snowflakes because it feels like negative 1 million in my house.
So, my frosty a** is jiggling down the hall and my anxiety is picturing all sorts of ludicrous situations – until my eyes reach our destination.
‘HEEELLPP!! HELP MomMY!’
She’s yelling at me from the middle of the living room with her arm outstretched because her foot is ‘stuck in the mud.’
With nothing but bare tiles around us, I close my eyes and take a deep breath of patience.
My body has already morphed into Frosty the Snowman, so sure, what’s a few extra minutes of preserving my boobsicles, a**icles, and vaginacles.
It’s go time, so my face drops into a display of complete and utter horror.
‘OH NO! Take my hand!’
I yell at her with my outstretched arm slowly reaching towards her.
A damn cute smile emerges from her and my frozen heart thaws a teeny tiny fraction.
I save the toddler, conquer the mud puddle, and walk my glacial a** back to my room muttering, ‘The things we do for our kids.’”
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