“When I met Brian, I was a healing domestic abuser survivor with 3 little babies from my abuser. Brian and I worked together, and I flirted, but got nothing from him. I thought maybe he had a girlfriend and thought I was a crazy person. I built up the courage to ask him on a date. As he walked to the table, I knew I had to tell him everything I’d been through.”
“I gently hugged my daughter. To be honest, it’s a question I’ve thought about daily for months. That’s the fear that comes with pregnancy after loss. I looked at her and smiled through tears. ‘She’s very healthy,’ I told my brave little girl. ‘That’s because Parker and Abby sent her to us,’ I said.”
“He took me out. We drank too much. I woke up the next morning in shock. I didn’t remember consenting to anything. We found out I was pregnant and I was terrified. Everything inside me was saying to detach from my son’s father. Instead, we did ‘the right thing’ and got married.”
“I’ll never forget his words. There were no warning signs. No grooming. I remember wanting to scream, but not feeling like I could talk, so I made a mumbling noise. I didn’t want my body. I wanted to take it off like a jacket, but I couldn’t. I woke up the next morning with a huge bump on my head, my underwear backwards. I never wanted to be the girl who was raped.”
“He waited for his dad and I to be able to hold him before he went. I held him as the nurses took the ventilator, with his daddy by his side. I was Saxon’s favorite place to be. I was his safe space. I believe with all my heart, he waited for me.”
“Is she ready for school? Did we do enough? I have first day jitters just thinking about it. But when it comes time to part ways, there will be no tears from either of us.”
“‘Did we do the right thing?,’ I asked my husband, tears streaming down my face. People thought we were crazy. But he was saving us.”
“Anyone else exhausted, feeling like no matter how hard you try, you just can’t get it right? Like everyone is watching, waiting to tear them down? It’s time we stop forming cliques that leave people out, and start forming communities.”
“How did my life land here? I was 24 years old and divorced. I was a college student and a mother, and suddenly, I was alone. ‘But isn’t it better than before you were divorced?’ is not a consolation. We’re afraid to admit the truth. Some days it’s unbearable. But I’m going to stop pretending.”
“I remember my mom stepping into the house. She looked different, weak. She blamed it on eating bad bacon…yes, bacon. I talked to her about the possibility of having had a heart attack. She looked at me stubbornly and said, ‘So?’ We convinced her to go to the hospital. She went only for her ‘little angels,’ her great grandkids. We found ourselves in tidal wave after tidal wave of problems.”
