“Isn’t the definition of insanity, ‘Trying the same exact thing over and over again, expecting to see different results?’ If it is, then this is exactly how infertility feels.
Sure, you try countless medications and put yourself through multiple different tests and procedures just in the hopes it brings you the miracle you have been longing for, but at the end of the day, you’re still trying for the same results constantly, to no avail sometimes. It’s completely mind-boggling when you think about it.
Each month, you go into your cycle with the exact same mindset: This time is your time and the precious little baby you have been waiting so long for is almost in your reach. Even though month after month you find yourself with empty arms and bitterly disappointed, does this stop you from continuing to try? Absolutely not.
No matter how lost you may feel, and despite the heartbreak you experience, you keep pushing yourself forward. You hold on to the hope your time is coming. You look at each day as a new chance to try again, even though in the back of your mind you know nothing is guaranteed.
I don’t think I’ll ever quite be able to describe the thought process you go through while navigating the unpredictable world of infertility, other than saying it takes a great deal of mental strength and a mountain of determination to endure it.
You put yourself through so much in such a short period of time so often with no promises anything you are doing will work. But you continually do it because you are willing to try absolutely anything and everything if it means it gives you even the slightest of chances at finally achieving your dreams.
I always say only the strongest and bravest of souls are chosen for this path, and I firmly believe this to my core. Infertility, you may be the definition of insanity, but it will never stop me from continuing to try for my own miracle…I know my time is coming.”
This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Mackenzie Eckinger of Ohio and originally appeared here. You can follow her journey on Instagram here and here. Submit your own story here, and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.
Read more from Mackenzie here:
I Want To Conceive, But I Don’t Want To Keep Trying
‘I’ve been seeing phrases like, ‘At least it happened early’ or ‘One miscarriage doesn’t compare to multiple’ a lot lately.’: Woman battling infertility urges ‘a loss is a loss and they all matter’
Another Month Has Gone By And We Still Aren’t Pregnant
I’ve Been Pregnant Eight Times, But I Still Don’t Know What It Feels Like To Be Pregnant
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