As I Sit Here, My Stomach Hanging Over My Jeans, I Realize Today Was Supposed To Be The Day I Started Getting It Together

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“I’m my own worst critic. The fake it ’til you make it motto? Yep – mastered it. Grin and bare it, right? It’s what we do.

We power through with our heads down. Don’t even think about asking for help, sis. It’s not an option. I mean, you don’t want people to think you are weak, do you?

Sis, can I be honest? It’s garbage. All of it.

I don’t know about you, but I’m hard enough on myself without worrying about the judgments of fifty other people.

As I sit here typing, my stomach is hanging over my jeans. Today was going to be the day I started getting it together. Go ahead and ask me how many chocolate chip cookies I’ve had today? Four. Yep. Crushing it, clearly. In my defense, I had a salad for lunch, so I feel marginally better about my choices.

Almost every week I rage text my girlfriends and declare this is going to be the pivotal turning point in my life where I get it together. Where I master life. NEWS FLASH – still hasn’t happened.

Why? Because life is never going to be perfect and I am definitely never going to be perfect, either. There is no mathematical formula I can apply to my life to get it all right.

Yet, it’s so easy to look at all of the areas in our life that need improvement, isn’t it? All of the areas of our life that need patched or repaired and focus on them. We use words like:

I can’t.
I need.
I want.
When I get this…then.

My point. Stop sucking it in. So your love handles hang over your jeans a little. So your marriage has hit a rough patch. Maybe there is illness in your family or health complications. Maybe your finances aren’t where you want them to be.

It’s not easy. This motherhood thing; this life thing. It’s OK to say it out loud.

You don’t have to hide behind your smile. You don’t have to put on a fake face and pretend everything is perfect. None of us are, but no matter what type of season of life you are in right now, there is always something to be grateful for. Stop focusing on the areas of your life that need improvement and instead, flip it.

Your body you keep critiquing…it pushed out three kids. For the love, give yourself some grace.

Your marriage…it’s OK if today you have zero nice things to say. If the sound of him crunching his cereal makes your skin want to crawl. You’ve made it 10 years, you’ve got this.

I think if we stopped and looked around, we would see we’re all in the same boat. There’s not one of us that’s doing it better than the other. Sure, maybe in one area they may be crushing it, but when we add it all up – we’re all just normal people trying to juggle life as best we can.

I’m not where I want to be, but I’m learning to be OK with that. I’m done smiling through the uncomfortable parts. Instead, I’m smiling because I can and you should too, because from where I’m sitting, you’re life looks pretty good, sis.”

Mom takes a selfie while in workout gear
Courtesy of Jennifer

This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Jennifer of They Whine, So I Wine. You can follow her journey on Facebook and Instagram. Submit your own story here and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories.

Read more from Jennifer here:

‘I’m not everyone’s cup of tea. I’m too loud, too quiet. We try so hard to bend 50 different ways to fit a mold, but why? For what?’: Woman learns to accept herself as is

‘My toddler screams, ‘Mommy, CHANGE MY BUTT,’ during my conference calls.’: Mom says ‘today you’ve done enough, give yourself some grace’

 ‘Did I love you enough today?,’ I wondered as I drove you to school through tears of frustration.. I catch a glimpse of you staring at me in the rear view.’

‘Why do we lie and utter the words ‘I’m fine’ to our friends? I’m tired of hiding, and I think you are, too.’ Mom admits motherhood has served her ‘a big slice of humble pie’

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