“Being a mom isn’t always easy.
In fact, it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
But on those unbearable days, the ones where I feel like every decision I make is wrong, and I’m drowning, using every last fiber of energy in my body to keep my head above the water, I close my eyes.
In and out,
In and out.
And I think of sleepy morning snuggles.
Your little body curling into mine, arms hooked around my neck as I bury my nose in your hair, inhaling deeply.
I think of toothless grins and bursts of giggles.
I think of you turning around for one last wave goodbye every morning when I drop you off at school.
I think of sticky hand holds and booty tan lines.
I think of the way your thick eyelashes rest against your cheek right after you fall asleep.
I think of the words you can’t pronounce but I’ll never correct because ‘no, please’ sounds so much cuter than ‘no, thank you.’
I think of how you rub your blankie underneath your nose, and never let me wash it.
I think of how you proudly read to me every night, and the way your tongue sticks out when you’re concentrating, just like your daddy.
I think of all the little moments. The ones that happen every day, and that should probably go unnoticed, but have left the biggest imprint on my heart.
The little moments that lift me up and carry me when those suffocating, unbearable days threaten to break me.
The moments that will be remembered long after the difficult ones are forgotten.
The moments that remind me that even though being a mom is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, loving you is by far the easiest.”
This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Mari Ebert. You can follow her journey on Instagram, Facebook, and her website. Submit your own story here, and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.
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