“If I was going to do this, I’d become the best damn trach parent that ever lived. The reality is, while our NICU chapter is over, this is far from normal. I can’t take Lily to the store, or anywhere, alone. My husband and I haven’t been alone in 4 months. One of us needs to be awake around the clock to care for her. There is no longer privacy in our home as our ‘special guests’ come in and out all day and night.”
“One day, Sandy sat by my bed. I hadn’t walked 50 steps in over a year. She was DONE. ‘What’s up, Sandy?’ She looked right at me and barked! ‘What is it?’ She barked again! I said, ‘Oh, please. What in the world are you doing?’ She was egging me to get up, to move. She wouldn’t quit until I walked. Once I took just a step, she stopped and laid down! Sandy started me on my journey back to life. She took away my fear and, in return, let me give her something I so desperately needed: unconditional love.”
“My husband was distracted by his phone at dinner. I got a little upset. ‘How could he not know how important date nights are to me?’ When we got home, my husband got upset at the growing pile of dishes. ‘I’m sorry, but it’s not a big deal.’ Then, like I’d tried to explain about not having one-on-one attention, he tried to explain why the dishes made him feel not appreciated. For the past 10 years, we’ve been loving each other the wrong way. Loving someone the way you want to be loved doesn’t always work.”
“I fell in love the second I saw him. He was just skin and bones and clearly malnourished. The breeder didn’t want her buyers to know her cat had genetic issues or was bred too soon. I could tell Cricket would fit right in with our crew.”
“A nurse grabbed me, saying, ‘Pray for your son NOW, and pray he makes it.’ She asked me if I needed to leave the room. ‘No, I’m NOT leaving my son.’ Every day I felt like I was dreaming. I don’t know how I was still standing.”
“During our phone conversation I remember him telling me, ‘Mija, I am so proud of you. I knew you would get accepted!’ It’s moments like these when I am happy to share with my parents because I know they are not only my accomplishments, but theirs as well.”
“I kept telling myself, ‘I just spotted, I haven’t bled a lot. There’s no way I’m having a miscarriage.’ I kept denying what the doctors and my gut told me. My coworker hugged me. ‘I’m so sorry and I hope you will be okay,’ she said. I thanked her and left as I no longer wanted to be there in the store crying.”
“I was ignorant about how my life would be reshaped in the days and weeks to follow. Your emotions soar to new heights and dip to new lows. ‘Have we rushed into being parents? Our lives were so easy before our son – now look!’ You don’t know how it will be until you’re ‘in it.”
“‘So, just because he has Down syndrome, you offer termination?’ She became quiet. ‘I will have to talk to the doctor and have her call you.’ Ummm..say what?”
“I walked out of the office and something just clicked. I didn’t want to rely on medication anymore to be happy. I didn’t want to live my life this way any longer. I knew in my heart there had to be some other option.”
