‘My husband and I ask each other for permission before making plans with friends.’: Woman shares marital practice for time apart, ‘we do it out of respect for our relationship’

“My husband asks me if it’s okay before he makes plans with his friends.

No, it’s not a control thing. It’s a respect thing.

I recently made a tweet on Twitter that read as follows:

‘My husband is literally a child when he wants to go out with his friends. Before he asks me if I’m okay with it, he’ll sit on the edge of the bed pretending to be interested in watching Gossip Girl.’

The response I got back was mixed.

Many said, ‘He shouldn’t have to ask you. That’s controlling.’

Or, ‘Why would he even have to ask you? He’s an adult.’

And while that is true, he is an adult, he is also a husband. And a father.

We both ask each other before making plans with friends.

Out of respect.

We have two kids, a marriage, a million things on our to do list, plus the together time that we need.

We ask out of respect that one of us may be tired, and want extra help with the kids.

We ask because we may have had a long, sh*tty day, and need each other to talk to about it.

We ask because one of us may have a date night planned already.

My husband and I ask each other if it’s alright, before we make plans.

Out of respect for each other, and our relationship.

It’s not a control thing. It’s a respect thing.”

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This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Caitlin Fladager. You can follow her journey on Facebook and Instagram. Submit your own story here, and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories.

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