“I never would have dreamed that my 6-year-old daughter would have shed this many tears already regarding ‘friends.’
‘No, you can’t play with us.’
‘Why do you wear dresses all the time?’
‘I don’t like that bow in your hair.’
‘You’re too little.’
These are all things my young daughter she’s already had spewed at her.
So, just like my mother taught me, I tell her to kill them with kindness. As a mama bear, I remind myself they’re just kids who are still learning their own ways of life.
But after a particular pair of older girls, who frankly know better, continued to be rude and exclude my daughter, I had to have a difficult talk with her.
‘Honey,’ I said. ‘Why do you want to be friends with these girls? Do they make you feel happy or sad?’
She played with one of her raggedy braids and then wiped her tears. ‘Sad,’ she said.
‘Look,’ I said. ‘There comes a time when you’ll have to decide whether these friends are worthy of you. Yes, you can still be kind, but that doesn’t mean you should spend your time with them if they continue to make you feel bad.’
Truth is, she just wants to fit in. She wants to feel accepted. She wants friends. But at the young age of six, she’s still learning what true friendship feels like. Yes, I want my daughter to always be kind.
But I do not want to raise a doormat.
There’s only so much a person can handle until they’re broken down completely. Going high when others go low is tough. So, when you consistently do it and it doesn’t work, it’s time to walk away.
I hope to teach my daughter to treat all people with kindness, even when they don’t treat her the same. But it sure as hell doesn’t mean she has to stick around. Because one of the most important lessons I can teach her is self-worth and when it’s time to walk away.”
This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Angela Anagnost. You can follow her journey on Facebook. Submit your own story here and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.
Read more from Angela:
‘They weren’t just born to rock the boat, they were born to build a new one. Strong-willed kids are a lot, but the world needs them.’: Mom to ‘tiny torpedo’ says strong-willed kids ‘will always be worth the struggle’
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