LJ Herman is a former editor at Love What Matters and lives in Colorado. LJ is a concert, ticket and technology enthusiast. He has seen the Dave Mathews Band over one hundred times and counting.
‘I’ll never forget walking into the hospital on a cold January night, preparing to give birth for the second time. The nurses buzzed me through the doors, but the atmosphere was anything but celebratory.’
“Strength was required to face the inevitable questions of ‘is this your first pregnancy?’ Or, ‘how many children do you have?’”
‘Just as I was attempting to fall asleep, I heard my oldest son whimpering in his room. This is so unusual that I raced down the hallway to check on him.’
“I cried a little bit thinking about my dad and how much I miss him and wish he were here. I fell asleep for a bit, but a weird dream jolted me awake. There were some creaks. Then, there was silence.”
‘Nothing prepared me for my wife’s cesarean. NOTHING. Birth was the most frightening thing I’d ever seen.’: Husband praises ‘stoic, strong, powerful, dedicated’ wife for ‘bringing children into the world’
“Reaching from a gaping hole in my beautiful wife’s stomach was the head of a bloody, powder white, child-like creature. I recall Mel lying naked in front of the doctors; her stomach like a deflated balloon. But nothing shocked me as much as the next day. She was the most badass person I knew.”
‘I go from loving him to hating his guts over a period of 24 hours. I never thought that would ever happen to us. Ever.’: Wife talks ‘seeing the bright side’ in your marriage and falling back in love
“Some people say they loved each other MORE after having children. I think that’s surely got to be a crock.”
‘I was starting to look pregnant, my boobs were huge, and I welcomed the nausea. The image appeared on the screen. I looked intently and finally asked, ‘where’s the heartbeat?!’
“I started laughing, mostly because it couldn’t possibly be true – I felt pregnant, I looked pregnant, and a week before, things were fine. I began sobbing.”
‘I was standing in line. An older gentleman said, ‘Why are you wearing that rainbow shirt? Are you some sort of fa***t?’: Man encounters homophobia for wearing rainbow shirt
“This man then goes on to mumble homophobic slurs to me, the whole time I’m waiting in line. I ignore him, pay for my food, and start to walk away. I then notice his card gets declined.”
‘That baby in the photo, the one you can’t see. The one who’s all snuggled up inside her mama. She did not survive.’
“I had been in the hospital for a week being monitored. I was in the safest place that I could be and under constant supervision. And then, it happened.”
‘Before kids you sleep in. After kids you’re whacked in the face at 5 a.m. because you’re someone’s little breakfast making machine because sleep is overrated.’
“Before kids, you make out in your big bed, have a little nasty time and fall asleep lovingly in each other’s arms. After kids, you promise you’ll meet up later and lock the bathroom door for some adult time, but instead you both fall asleep snoring.”
‘The doctor starts clicking away on the ultrasound machine, trying to get a better look. ‘Well, you are pregnant.’ He said it looked ‘good.’ Then, he went silent.’
“I woke up at 1 a.m. on our wedding anniversary, and felt like I needed to go to the bathroom. This wasn’t unusual. I had been pregnant for over a month. But something didn’t feel right.”
‘The first thing in his search was, ‘How to track girlfriend’s phone.’ Blood drained from my face.’: After becoming a ‘shell’ of her former self in abusive relationship, woman finds true love, realizes ‘I am enough’
“I saw bruises on my 2-year-old’s face. I figured, ok he’s clumsy, maybe he fell down or something. Then I found a bruise on his neck that looked like a handprint. I pushed the feeling aside, and thanked her for watching my boys. I ran my little guy a bath and started taking his clothes off. Immediately I knew something more sinister had happened. My baby had bruises from his upper back all the way down to his ankles.”