‘I don’t want a fake smile or a forced, ‘I’m doing okay. How about you?’ You can leave that ish at the door.’: Woman claims ‘real sisterhood is created in the trenches’

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“Hey you. Yes, you. How are you doing?

Before you answer that, please know that I don’t want a fake smile, a little tilt of your head, and a forced  ‘Oh, I’m doing okay. How about you?‘

Nope. You can leave that ish at the door.

Save that for someone else.

I want you to tell me that some days you are making bread, singing along to your favorite playlist with your family, and preparing delicious meals that you’ve had pinned on Pinterest for months–ummm, maybe years.

I also want you to tell me that some days you catch yourself crying in the shower now more than usual, you wake up with the weight of the (broken) world on your shoulders, and while at times you don’t realize it, your jaw is always, always, clenched.

I want you to tell me that some days you find yourself enjoying the pockets of peace, wherever you may find them. Whether it’s cozied up on the sofa watching a movie, walking on your favorite nature trail, or that first sip of coffee in the morning while the rest of the world is still fast asleep.

I also want you to tell me that some days you find it hard to pray, you find it difficult to smile, and you just fervently hope that the ones you cannot hug right now will still be there when this is done.

I want you to tell me that some days are easier than others. I want you to tell me that some days are happier than others. I want you to tell me that, some days? Some days you just don’t know how you’ll ever push through.

Sisterhood is not created in the fake smiles, little tilts of the head, or in the forced, ‘Oh, I’m doing okay. How about you?’

Nope. You won’t find it there.

Rather sisterhood is created in the trenches. It is created when you are lifting someone up on your shoulders, just so they can reach the ledge and crawl out. It is created when they finally get out of those trenches, only to reach their hand back down in, just to help haul you out, and should you not be ready to get out of those trenches quite yet? Well, they’ll crawl back down in with you. And you’ll try again later.

That’s where you’ll find sisterhood, my friends.

Don’t be afraid to crawl in.”

Courtesy of Heather Delaney

This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Heather Delaney of Love Always, Heather. You can follow her journey on Instagram. Submit your own story here and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories.

Read more from Heather:

‘To the woman who cannot afford to stock up on essentials for her baby right now, you are still a good mother.’: Woman pens note to mothers struggling through coronavirus pandemic

‘Dear Little Sister, you may have been the ‘lucky one’ back then, but I’m the lucky one now.’: Woman shares appreciation letter for little sister, ‘You taught me to live and love’

‘He doesn’t buy flowers or cook romantic meals, but he always pushes the grocery cart.’: Woman claims ‘love is found’ in small gestures, learns to accept husband as is

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