‘I was told, ‘It’s good you had a C-section. You had it easy.’ I did not get a lucky pass.’: Mom urges ‘please stop thinking C-sections are no big deal’

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“Every birthing story is different, but it is amazing no matter how you give birth. Sadly, there has been a stigma over giving birth via Cesarean section, and I have experienced it.

I had to go through an emergency C-section back in 2016 to save my baby’s life. She had a decreasing heartbeat, and at the same time, I was also diagnosed as Polyhydramnios (excessive amniotic fluid), causing fetal malposition. This wasn’t what I wanted for my birth plan, but it was what I needed. I was blessed with a healthy and beautiful baby girl.

Unfortunately, I was faced with not-so-nice comments from friends and relatives. Someone told me, ‘It’s good you had a C-section. You had it easy since you didn’t have to push the baby out.’ And just recently, when I was asked about plans for a second baby, this person said I should go for more kids because I had such an easy go the first time. I experienced a C-section, she said, which was a lot easier compared to what she had to go through with three kids who were all normal delivery.

I’m sure they mean no harm, but comments like these don’t help to the well-being of a mother. It makes us feel that we got a lucky pass and did it the easy way.

Courtesy of Yce Tucker-Tiburcio

Anyone who went through a C-section will tell you it is an intense experience. It is a major surgery where our stomachs were ripped open. We endure pain for months and long recovery time with post-surgery risks.

I am not saying C-sections are harder than normal delivery. I’ve had my fair share of stories from my mom, aunts, and sisters of how hard it is going through labor and pushing for hours.

What I’m saying is people need to stop thinking C-sections are no big deal. There is no superior form of giving birth, and there is no competition, because our baby’s first cry is all that matters. We should not feel pressured or shamed because of the choices we had to make.

I was prepared physically, mentally, and financially to deliver via natural spontaneous delivery (NSD). I even planned for a water birth. However, after 48 hours of labor, my cervix dilated for only 5cm. They rupturedmy water bag, but three hours later, my labor did not progress. My OB decided to do a C-section.

Courtesy of Yce Tucker-Tiburcio

I felt less of a mother at first, even worthless because I couldn’t help with household chores. I would cry to my husband because of the pain due to the incision. But having a great support system that included my husband, parents, and sister helped me heal physically and emotionally.”

Courtesy of Yce Tucker-Tiburcio

This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Yce Tucker-Tiburcio, and originally appeared on www.smartparenting.com.ph. You can follow her journey on Instagram. Submit your own story here, and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories and YouTube for our best videos.

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