“Now you’re left exhausted, thinking what the hell did we just do? Am I an imposter because I failed? I flipped my mindset. It felt good to dive into something again, which started with ripping up all the carpet in the upstairs of our house. There was no sense in avoiding a room meant for a nursery when I could change it into a usable space.”
‘My miscarriage crushed me. I screamed and cried in the nursery closet, clenching my son’s wubby so hard my palms bled. I was inconsolable.’
‘A co-worker came up to me. ‘Half your face looks a little strange.’ I tried to respond, but couldn’t move my mouth to speak. My first thought was, ‘Am I having a stroke?’: Woman shares trigeminal neuralgia diagnosis journey
“I rushed to the hospital. The pain was so bad I literally thought, ‘There’s no possible way I am going to survive this. A human being can’t survive this much pain.’ I was prescribed a copious amount of medication. When would I stop needing it? Never. I thought I would never get a chance to be a mom, but I didn’t want to give up my dream.”
‘She sat next to her dying father, her best friend, and grabbed his hand. She whispered in his ear it was ‘ok to go.’ She would be alright. He could stop being in pain.’
“With her hair in a ponytail and her face stained with tears, she pet his hair while he gasped for air. She put a cross in his hand when she knew he was never coming back. She kissed him on the cheek and uttered ‘goodbye.’ She sat with him for an hour after he stopped breathing, making sure he was not alone.”
‘Why me? How did I get black and white twins? I waited for someone to tell me there was a mixup.’: Mom births twins after 8-year fertility struggle, one with albinism, ‘She’s perfect to me in every way’
“The first time I saw her, I wondered if the nurse was handing me my baby, or someone else’s. I waited a few seconds for someone to tell me there was a mix up. ‘She’s so beautiful,’ the nurse said. My husband was also in denial, but reality was staring us in the face.”
‘My career failed. Everyone kept asking, ‘What are you doing these days?’ I’d just want to run away. I didn’t know what to tell them. I had no answers.’
“All my friends who had been doing nothing post-college, partying and vacationing, now all had good positions and were making good money. I thought, ‘Where am I? What am I doing? What am I going to do next?’ Slowly, I just became too comfortable avoiding people and doing absolutely nothing.”
‘Are you sick? Should I get tested?’ My first instinct was denial. ‘I’m not sick. If you want to get tested, do it. You don’t have it!’ I was confused. How could she even say that to me?! I was shocked!’
“My dad proceeded to tell me the illness could be passed down to me as well. I wanted to get tested right away. My dad urged me to take it slow. When I got married the next year and found out we were expecting our first child, I knew in my heart I needed to know. On a crisp spring morning, I took the test. That’s when I realized it.”
‘When we got the news death was coming soon, I was driving us home. I started crying, and couldn’t stop. He held me on the side of the interstate. Then HE took over driving.’: Widow recalls the ways late husband showed her ‘real love’
“Every time the hospice people asked if they could do anything for him, he would answer that he was only worried about me, his wife. I tried not to cry, because he wanted his last days to be happy and without tears. Then, I opened his work bag and found it.”
‘I found out I was pregnant one month after I turned 19 years old. ‘The second line is faint. You’re very early in your pregnancy,’ the nurse said. I had not even missed a period yet. Utterly shocked.’
“I tried to go on with life pretending nothing was wrong, while keeping this enormous secret, but ultimately couldn’t think about anything else. His birth was bittersweet. I held him, sobbing, as I signed away my rights as his mother.”
Life Is Too Short For Toxic Friendships
“Eliminating toxic friendships is one of the hardest things about growing up. The realization that the bond you thought you had with someone is over is a hard one. But it’s not fair to you, or them, to surround yourself with anyone who makes you less than HAPPY. It’s okay to find the strength to let go.”
‘Our life came to a halt. Our son was gravely ill. Looks can be deceiving. I tell him how guilty I am. His eyes become glassy. ‘I’m OK. I have a son,’ he says with a smile. I begin to sob.’
“As we pack up our belongings and head to the car, my husband can tell something is off. The moment we get into the car, I break down. We had been faced with the unimaginable. Two of our children passed away.”