Becky Balfe

Rebecca Balfe is a former editor for Love What Matters. She resides in NYC, owning and rescuing adorable cats. She is an avid Lupus fighter and advocate.

‘The doctor said, ‘The parents need to understand there is no chance of their daughter having a meaningful life.’ I thought, ‘My daughter has meant more to me in the last 2 days than you will EVER mean to me.’

“What would our daughter have to do to be meaningful? Would she have to talk? Would she have to be able to solve math problems or perform in the school play? Graduating? Getting a job? Getting married? At what point would the doctor say, ‘Ok, you are meaningful now.”

‘I cried and wept uncontrollably because of how he was going to be made fun of, and thought of as less or not worthy. I never want my child to feel that hurt and pain. The sadness was so deep, it crushed my soul.’

“I know something about one of the children you don’t. You see two children holding hands and playing on a playground. Nothing special, just cute as usual. Children playing like they usually do, like they should be doing. But it is so much more than just that.”

‘For some of us, especially us mothers, there are certain minutes where time stands still and we just know we’ll remember every detail surrounding that specific memory.’

“There are many of us invisible parents, with only children we hold in our hearts rather than our arms. We don’t have any other living children to help ease the pain and ache, but let me assure you, our motherhood and fatherhood is valid and important, and our children’s lives matter.”

‘If I took all of those pills, maybe I would go to sleep and never wake up.’ I scrubbed myself raw. I couldn’t get clean.’: Woman discovers husband’s multiple affairs, ‘I felt dirty’

“I got a call from my best friend’s husband. It was clear he didn’t really know how to say it. ‘If it were me I would want to know.’ My hands and feet got hot and sweaty. It was so many people… so many of my friends were involved. I couldn’t trust anyone. All I could do that week was sob, hysterically sob and compulsively take showers.”

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