‘The feeling a little bit lost and the, ‘How does she do it?’ It’s isolating and it’s universal.’: Mom addresses ‘growing pains’ of motherhood

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“Can we talk about the moments in motherhood when you feel a little lost?

Like you look at another mother and wonder, ‘How does she do it?’

Like you look at the things you used to do or the person you used to be and it feels like worlds are moving on without you?

Like your day was your night and your night was your day and you tried to work, but you’re not sure what you got done, but you feel like you can’t do anything more, too?

Like you wonder if you can move in two directions at once while being in one place?

Mom sits in a rocking chair holding her baby.
Courtesy of Cassie Shortsleeve

Lost as you wonder, ‘How does she do it?’

I think these are the growing pains of motherhood that we don’t talk about — the words that exist beneath the surface of ‘How’s the baby?’ and ‘Are you sleeping?’

The comparison and the identity changes.

The buckets we fall into or don’t fall into or used to fall into.

It’s isolating and it’s universal — the feeling a little bit lost and the, ‘How does she do it?’

But when you really look at it, you’re doing it, too.”

mom holding both of her children while taking a photo
Courtesy of Cassie Shortsleeve

This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Cassie Shortsleeve of Dear Sunday. You can follow her journey on Instagram and join her mom groups on her website. Submit your own story here, and be sure to subscribe to our free email newsletter for our best stories, and YouTube for our best videos.

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