I’m Excited For More Time With My Kids This Summer, But I’m Also Sad

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“There are moms everywhere who celebrate the last day of school. Everyone seems to be in full countdown mode. I rarely hear anyone share the negative feelings associated with this day.

We have a few days left of school. My boys are 15, 13, and 7. Yes… I’m excited for sunny days, vacations, more time to be with my kids, less carpooling, and all the goodness those summer months bring, but… I also feel sad about it all.

It feels like my boys are slipping through my fingers every single and day. The last day of school amplifies this even more for me. They are a grade older and a year older. Time can feel even shorter when we are all together under one roof… Even though I truly enjoy us all being under one roof.

There is just something so finalizing about finishing a school year that makes my heart want to burst into tears. After a year in a pandemic (yes, I’m grateful they are happy, healthy, and we have made it through all of this without many scars), I still feel some sadness, and it’s okay.

Most of my best memories from childhood were made in the summer. My husband and I have been really intentional to do the same for our kids. Lots of time outside, lots of memorable trips, grilling foods day and night, ice cream all day long, swimming, beach trips, and more family dinners. All of these things are so good for my soul, but can also leave me exhausted.

Another hard part of the last day of school is there is no more childcare or breaks for this work at home mama. This is something that seems to be glossed over. Many stay-at-home or work-from-home moms can get breaks from parenting nonstop and can focus a little more on themselves. They can feel more accomplished with the tasks and projects they want to complete without living in ‘multitask’ mode.

When self-care seems to feel impossible, the school year gives us some pockets of time to rest or focus on our own goals. In the summer, I am usually at the bottom of the priority list and this can be hard.

On this last day of school, I am acknowledging all the good and bad that comes with this day. The sadness in my heart and the joy in my soul. I may hold my kids a little tighter this summer. I will also choose more self-love in the midst of this demanding season. I won’t hold myself to a standard of what I ‘should do’ with my kids each day, but I will give myself the grace to do what’s best for us each day.

I hope you will too! You’re doing a great job!”

Mom standing outside with three sons smiling
Courtesy of Jehava Brown

This story was submitted to Love What Matters by Jehava Brown. Follow her on Facebook here and Instagram here. Visit her website here. Submit your story here, and be sure to subscribe to our best love stories here

Read more from Jehava:

‘I don’t like playing with my kids, and that’s okay.’: Mom urges ‘you are exactly what your child needs’

‘Dear white moms, what I need you to know…’: Mom explains how to discuss race with your children

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